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Friday, June 5, 2009

Angel had me screaming and moaning the other night!

Yeah.

Mmmmhhhmmmmm.

I knew that would bring you in here.

Nosey asses!

Naw...for real though.

I was sitting outside the other night while Angel was Q'n some pork chops and sausage. That was the same night as the lightning storm and all that heavy rain in some parts of Texas. We only got some sprinkles so he kept Q'n.

This shouldn't come as a surprise to some people who know Angel. He's Q'd during a hail storm before.

The man is relentless!

I was covering myself with a towel because it was just sprinkling. Angel casually leaned over and picked something off the towel just under my chin.

I told myself, "don't ask, just ignore and keep talking."

So I did. I ignored.

I could see out of the corner of my eyes....this fluttering....

"Don't look! You know you shouldn't look! Just keep talking!"

So I keep talking.

Blah Blah Blah.....I'm sitting in my chair talking to Angel and his eyes looked downward, toward the space under my chair.

I knew I would regret looking down to see what he was staring at.

*cringing* "DON'T LOOK!! C'MON, YOU KNOW BETTER!!!"

My stupid ass looked.

I saw them and screamed.

AAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!

You know, one of those blood curdling scary movie screams, where the white girl gets slaughtered cause she keeps looking back. (What?!?!...she does!)

Now, Angel, he just laughs at me cause he knows I always scream.

Yet, he always asks in his chuckling voice, "Why do you always scream?"

I was screaming because there were June bugs under my chair.

They were upside down wiggling their feet at me.

Ughhh!

I hate June bugs!!

Little brown bugs that fly around blindly bumping into things. Mostly......ME!

They always manage to aim right for my neck. The back of my neck. Kamikaze style.

Then there are those with slightly more flight skills that manage to hit my cheeks and my forehead when I'm not looking.

It just totally grosses me out.

They come at me looking just like that. They just bounce around waiting on me to send someone to stomp on them in order to save my life.
Another creature that is out to get me......
FLYING COCKROACHES!!

Nasty fuckers start coming out from all over when it's about to rain. They seek shelter under MY ROOF. Right in the corners of the rooms so that when you walk into the room they flutter their wings to make you look up at them and they, too, dive at you kamikaze style.

The only thing you can do is swat wildly into the air and try to get away.

They come straight for my neck too.

The roaches weren't out that night but the June bugs were gathering an army right outside my door. I knew that if we opened the door they would fly in and I would be running for my life all night!

I was just gathering the food to take inside and Angel said, "They're right behind you!!!"

THAT SENT ME OFF!!

More screams and tip-toeing to get away.

I scream during "scary" movies too. It doesn't have to be a super scary movie but if the scene is one that is supposed to make you scream or...you know...is supposed to be especially scary....I actually scream.

I get into the movies. I like to experience them fully.

My kids are used to it and so is Angel (I think).

Now, for those of you who wandered into my blog just because of the title.....welcome pervs!

I hope you come back!!

4 comments:

Julie H said...

ICk so gross couldn't even finish reading it!

ShelbyAnne said...

I'm so so SO glad I don't live somewhere with cockroaches and junebugs. That would TOTALLY gross me out all the time.

tha unpretentious narcissist© said...

where does superwoman live that doesn't have cockroaches & junebugs, they are everywhere. country, city, jungle, desert (well maybe not the desert)..but i'm saying. think you just don't pay attention to them.

as for you and your kamikaze style bugs attacking you. i must admit i saw the title and thought ol' girl from twitter message got through finally and..well yanno i guess i'm one of the pervs. lol

~Sheila~ said...

MOMTJ:
And these are only pictures. Those damn things are EVERYWHERE! Upclose and personal.

Superwoman:
No Junebugs, No cockroaches? Must be a surburban area or somethin...Girl, they are everywhere...unless your ants ate them...lol.

TUN:
I don't know man...I don't know. Must be an expensive place though.

Yeah...I knew the title would draw attention. I knew just what everyone would be thinking too. I laughed cause...What kind of girl do you guys think I am?...lol