True Story.

This just happened today.

I was having a conversation with one of my patients about wrinkles. I few days ago I was treating her knee (only, her hip was her major problem but somehow it affected her knee) and explaining a lymphadema massage to her. How her kneecap, in extension, should bare wrinkles. Hers didn't. Her knee was pretty swollen. So I performed the massage at that time.
Today, she came back talking about how her "knee has wrinkles" and "it feels soo much better".
She was really excited about her wrinkles.

One other lady in the room next to her, receiving therapy, commented on her excitement saying, "Well if you're that excited about your wrinkles..you're in the right place. This place is crazy".

(the vast majority of the patients I treat are permanent residents of the facility. This other lady started out here and demanded to go home and just come in for treatment. She couldn't stand sleeping overnight there. Like she LIVED there.)

Anyway, my knee lady changed the subject to how she, at one point, wanted a face lift. She wanted to get rid of her droopy neck. This woman is extremely young looking. I wouldn't even have guessed she would be a place like this if I saw her on the street.

I kind of shrugged because I don't really know how to give advice to elderly women who want plastic surgery and they are oblivious to the fact that there are other MORE IMPORTANT issues that need to be addressed.

Like maybe addressing the reason why they randomly fall and break their hips.

I just told her: I gave up trying to get my supermodel body back after I had my three kids.

She said: You're right. Besides... (she says as she stokes her neck) I WORKED HARD for the wrinkles in my neck.

*silence*

Then I BUSTED out laughing.

She knew I knew what she was talking about.

I. Cracked. Up.

On top of that. I broke out the Wii.
One of my ladies was having a birthday today so I told her we were going to go bowling.
So we're there and I'm egging the ladies on and bringing out their competitive sides.

What some people often forget...most elderly people are rotting away in nursing homes sleeping, eating, being placed in front of the TV in large rooms.
No mental stimulation.

When I'm treating my patient, I like to talk and joke around with them as if we've been friends forever. I ask them odd questions and they love it because it's not the same old stuff that people always ask. They get to come up with their own witty answers.

So...the Wii....Nothing like a little competition to get these people going. They eat it up and they start bringing themselves to therapy instead of us hunting them down in the halls.

We played and hollered and cheered and smack-talked. It was fun. These ladies were pretty much neck and neck with about 4 points separating them all.
Nearing the end of one of our games, (around the 7th frame) Mrs. "Wrinkles" decided she needed to go to the restroom. We have one in our gym. She gets up from her wheelchair and hobbles with her walker to the restroom saying, "Don't nobody take my turn!"

At that moment, "Birthday" lady blurted out, "Well, you shouldn't have gotten up then!"

I BUSTED out laughing. Again.

I turned my back to repeat the story to the other therapist who was co-treating with me and as we chuckled a little, the bathroom door comes busting open and Mrs. "Wrinkles" comes hustling out saying, "THAT WAS THE FASTEST PEE I EVER TOOK!"

You know what happened then...Busted out.

In the game...."Birthday" lady was in the lead and Mrs. "Wrinkles" made a remarkable come-back with TWO strikes in the tenth frame.

That's what I'm talking about!

Adrenaline pumpers.

Everyone went home happy.

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Another conversation:

One of our new elderly rehab patients had just come into the gym and the ladies were remarking about how lovely her hair looked. They asked her questions about when she had gotten it done and who did it. (We have an in-house hair dresser).

The new lady "Mrs. Curly" informed them that she had gotten it done two days ago but not here in this building.

The Ladies were oohing and awwwing over her do.

One lady "Mrs. Snippy" asked if she was trying to catch a man.

Mrs. Curly asked: Do you think so?

Mrs. Snippy: Well, I don't know if you want to catch a man here. If you do happen to get one, you might just have to change his diapers.


The Ladies loved that one.