Vacation Hot Spots.

My best friend Jenn is going to go and visit this guy she is dating who is in the military. He's in England. (Yeah, I know I said she is a lesbian...she's actually BI. She has a 13 yr old daughter).

Anyway. She was asking me about places to go while she was there and he was at work.
Uhhhh...How should I know? I don't frequent England.

The only thing I could come up with was for her to watch HOSTEL and AN AMERICAN WAREWOLF IN LONDON.

I hope it helps.

Home Sweet Home!

LAST NIGHT....

So last night my friend Jen and I went out. She is only a few years younger than I am. We got dressed up and Angel stayed home with the kids. Understand one thing...I don't go out very often...at all. Im a super home-body. I prefer to entertain at home, IF I decided to entertain at all. We've been out together before and well...we are usually home by 10:30-11:00. Last night was going to be different! We were going to be out till the cows come home! We were on a mission!

Also keep in mind that I don't have a lot of dress up clothes. I'm very laid back and casual in my dressing (except in my scrubs for work). So the few tops that I had didn't even fit right. I have this one black top but it's very low cut and that is what I had to wear. I knew I was going to be fighting with the dang "V" neck all night.....and I did. We first went to our friend's house to visit with her and have a few drinks before we actually hit a bar (she's a lesbian) and she had a safety pin that I could use to help with my shirt situation. So here I am fumbling with the safety pin and my shirt and my bra trying to keep everything from popping out.
No luck. the safety pin was too big and it was just obvious that i was trying to pin my shirt. So no pin. (I really need to get new clothes, or just stay home).

We talked about our kids over drinks. I told them about how just yesterday Dom was busted by me for cussing as soon as I picked him up from school. He started telling me some story about some bird and he said the 'F' word. Of course when I called him on it he denied it and even broke out some tears while proclaiming that 'I don't even believe him when he tells me the truth!'
Yeah...Okay.
So this is what I told him. "Alright, I'll believe you, but understand this...I am giving you fair warning right now. Don't let me hear you cussing. You just turned into a teenager 4 days ago. Don't think you're grown. I am pretty sure that you are hanging with your friends cussing up a storm around them like it's nothing. Watch out, you're going to get too comfortable saying these words and you're gonna slip up and say it at home."
Sure enough...he did. He was in my room talking with Jen and I before we left to go out and he turned to walk out of the doorway and he tripped. Clear as a bell he said, "Oh, Shit!". He disappeared.
Jen and I sat there looking at each other saying, "did he just say what I think he said?"
We called him back and he of course denied it...while trying out his newly developed squeezing out tears routine. We asked him what he said and he tried to tell us "I said OH!"
WRONG!
I told him, "I heard 2 words come out of your mouth."
We busted him. Then as we were walking out of the door, I told Angel about that little episode and at that time Dom tried to cover it up and said..."I said..I TRIPPED."
Whatever...he's busted twice in one day. Not a good record for a 13 year old.

Anyway..We go to another place and get our drinks, the thing about us is....we talk about anything no matter where we are.
So there we are sitting face to face in a booth and she just says, "I need to have a boob job done just like this...", now..not only does she say it out loud but she grabs her breasts (one in each hand), squishes, lifts, separates and places them on the edge of the table. I was a teensy bit horrified at this point because the "booth" we were in wasn't an actual booth that is taller than your head when you are sitting but only shoulder level. Yes, people may have seen my friend fondling herself at the table unintentionally.

Now, in my much younger years, I used to be able to put away a ton of beer. Last night, I was sipping it like it was hot chocolate. I know I'm getting old. We baby sat our drinks (both of them). Then we moved onto another location and babysat our drinks there. We were eager to get somewhere and I believe that somewhere was home.

We managed to pilfer around until we walked in the door at 12:12am. We did it! We stayed out until tomorrow!

TODAY....

I gave it up for a sprite.

How shallow can I be? We didn't have any and the only thing that makes my head feel better after drinking is sprite. My husband said he would go and get me some if I "gave it up".
deed done. sprite drank.
moving on...

It's saturday. Jen and I got roped into a birthday party and running errands for said party like getting ice...chips...stuff from the dollar store. We were there for HOURS and the party had barely begun. Angel had taken the boys with him to his dad's house and I had Miah. Miah had a ball cause its a party. We were surrounded with tons of kids. As soon as we left there, we picked up something to eat, some ice-cream, came home, picked a movie and just bummed.
That is my plan for the rest of the night. I'm exhausted. I'm happiest on my couch or in my bed resting.

That's what I am going to do now. My eyes are heavy. I feel like everything and everyone is in slow motion. (except Miah).

It's 7:30 now....hmmm...almost bed time.

New Tactic...gone bad.

I thought I had found a new tactic for getting my husband to take care of things around the house.....at least for the day.
Here's how...
I went to the dentist yesterday. I got a couple of fillings in on the top left teeth.

(BTW-I didn't get any more "sneaky pics" of my dentist, I tried but they were highly embarrassing photos of his ceiling, cabinet, lights...even my ear. Guess I'll hold on to my day job after all).

Anyway, he shot me up with lidocane again. The other times were on the bottom back row of teeth so the injections were no biggie...this time they were so close to my nose. I was there and worried about picking up the kids on time so I texted my husband and asked if he will be able to because of my situation. He got off work early to get them. I finally got out and went home and he was there sitting on the couch. I sat next to him and showed him the many funky faces I could make with my upper lip being numb. I couldn't drink cause I couldn't pucker. I couldn't sip from a spoon for the same reason.

He thought it was pretty funny.

After a while, my upper lip started to itch because the numbness was starting to wear off. THEN..it hit me. My nose started to become irritated because it felt like I was inhaling too much air from it. I was starting to feel a little pain from the injection site. (keep in mind..I said 'little pain').

BUT...I sooooo overplayed it.

I, being the wife and mother, hardly ever get sick and when/if I do no one really takes care of me. no one brings me soup and lays with me and checks on me or covers me. So..here was my chance. I'm running with it.

Angel (my husband) decided he was going to do laundry for me and cook dinner for the kids. I mentioned that we have some hamburger helper in the pantry so he goes and gets it. I'm laying on the couch watching my shows (Medium and Bones) eating ice-cream......cause well, I told him it helps my 'pain'.

He has already started dinner and is gathering clothes for the laundry. My shows are over and I am tired. I decided to go and lay in bed. I did ask him a couple times if he needs my help. "Nope", he said. "Okaaaay".

Later he sends Devyn to ask me what I was doing. I get up to check what he needed and well...The food is undercooked (the pasta anyway). I explain that he has to bring it all to a boil THEN let it simmer...Okay....back on track.

Back to bed.

He comes back in later to tell me that...well...not to scrape the pan, just get the food on top cause it burnt.
*sigh*

Now I pictured a little burned.

This morning, I wake up. He's gone to work. I go to the kitchen and there is this pan on the stove with what looks like a full pan of food. But, it's actually a full pan of charred remains. ( I really should let him stick to cooking on the grill).

Clothes are ALLLLL over the place, living room. dining room. hall.

This, ladies and gentlemen, is what happens when you become a teensie bit coniving.

It appears my plan has backfired. My instincts told me I should have aborted this whole operation back when the food was undercooked.

Now..I am in charge of damage control.

On a brighter note...One of my best friends is coming this Friday for the weekend to see me. I've known her since our oldest kids were 3 (10 yrs). She only lives 2 hrs away so we see each other frequently.

She lost her job and is looking to move up here where I am. Unfortunately, in Sept. I will be moving down to the Valley where she is currently living. We are going to go out and Angel is going to hang with the kids. She wants to find a chick to hook up with (she's a lesbian).
I have a ton of lesbian friends. Angel was always afraid that they were going to gang up on me and convert me to lesbianism. I had to explain to him that it isn't exactly how it works. Girls like me...yes.Some even hit on me. Am I interested in girlies?...NO. I mean..I will see a pretty girl and think she's pretty or has a great body, but No, not into girls.

I prefer my Angel.

Either way, I guess I'll be out scouting for chicks for her this weekend.